What if Soccer ruled?

In these, the dog days of summer, one cannot help but be sick of Brett Favre stories. As a sports fan, this is easily the worst time of year. Football's still a ways off (though there's that early training camp excitement starting to make my spine tingle), the MLB All-Star break came and went with as little fanfare as usual, the NBA's long gone, and not even the impending Olympics can fully save us. I'm fairly addicted to mainstream sports media, and even the inane chatter that they normally produce to my delight is no relief since most of the best personalities take vacations and give way to the folks who usually are relegated to the coveted "Sundays from midnight to 6:00 a.m." spot. It's terrible.



One random blip of excitement amidst the dreariness came with Euro 2008. Mostly--I think-- because ESPN's parent company now co-owns a soccer team, but this typically obscure-in-America sporting event got some buzz and some pub. I've thought about this before, and it made me wonder what our sports scene would be like if there were no Big 3 sports in America (Football, Baseball, and Basketball)? How would that affect the United States' current laughable status on the international soccer scene?



There are some who'd tell you that we're only a few years away from a real breakthrough in the United States' level of soccer play. There are some who'd tell you that we only need wait for the thousands and thousands of children and teenagers who grew up loving soccer to grow up and take their place among the world's elite. Then, maybe then, the United States will become a contender.



Well, as much as I can appreciate the sheer athleticism and skill of soccer players (especially since I'm no good at it) and can admire their fitness level, I'm just not seeing it. For one thing, Lacrosse is making some real headway into becoming the next "sport that nobody pays attention but would love it if they'd get off of football's high horse and just watch it for a while," and as such is eating a bit into that same niche of young soccer players.



But the main problem is just that there's no room. Unless they could cram a full-blown soccer season into the space between the end of the NBA and the start of the NFL, there's just no room in our attention spans, no market space, and so little incentive for the best athletes in the United States (the ones with the level of talent to go pro and make a TON of money) to play soccer over any of the Big 3 sports.



But what if they did? What if, in an alternate universe, there was no NFL, no MLB, and no NBA? What if we had the opportunity to stick it to the rest of the world who mocks our status on the stage of the world's most popular sport? What would our starting 11 look like if the best athletes of the Big 3 (probably MLB excluded because, as 2-time All Star, career .300 batting average star John Kruk said, "I'm not an athlete. I'm a professional baseball player.") played soccer their whole lives? Let's take a look at that roster (I'll list more than 11, but there's enough depth for several rosters):



Goal keeper: I'm thinking any elite NBA small forward to power forward (or even center) could do nicely. How 'bout Kevin Garnett? 6'-11", insanely long wingspan and great quickness for a dude that big. The rebounding skills and ability to guard small should translate nicely to keeper.



Fullbacks: Quick linebackers, running backs, and maybe small forwards would dominate, or maybe even NFL fullbacks. Think Urlacher, Merriman (Remember those sick contorted-body picks last year? Imagine him getting corner kicks out of the way), maybe Artest, LDT, and Ray Lewis in some combination.



Midfielders: Some mix of NBA point guards and defensive backs would be ideal. Imagine Deron Williams, CP3, Asante Samuel, and Rodney Harrison.



Forwards: NBA two guards and wide receivers for height, speed, and quickness. Think Kobe, Dwayne Wade, Terrel Owens, and Chad Johnson. Average height is about 6' 3" with that.



I look at a breakdown like that, and I think two things. One, it would be fun to think about. But mostly, I just can't wait for football season. Did I just write that much about soccer? Yikes. Thank heaven for football training camp. Came not a moment too soon.